October Odyssey II
It was the last of its kind, the end of an era.
On a rainy Wednesday, somewhere far away, it happened again.
The rain had been falling for hours, its rhythm blurring the edges of the world outside the café window. Elise sat at a corner table, her hands wrapped around a mug of coffee gone lukewarm. She hadn't planned to be here. She had been walking aimlessly, letting the rain soak her thoughts, when the neon glow of the café sign had pulled her in.
She wasn't surprised when Carter walked through the door.
Carter always seemed to find her, as if her existence left invisible trails for him to follow. He stood at the entrance, shaking rain off his coat, his hair wild and wet. When their eyes met, Elise felt that familiar pang - half yearning, half ache.
Carter paused, then stepped into the room. "Hey," he said, sliding into the seat across from Elise.
"Hi," Elise said, her voice firmer than she felt.
They sat in silence for a moment, the sound of rain filling the space between them. Carter's gaze fell upon Elise's mug, then to his own hands, which fidgeted with the edges of the napkin. Finally, he spoke.
"I wanted to see you before you left."
Elise didn't know what to say to that. There was something infuriatingly selfish about the way Carter always appeared, just when Elise was trying to move on. "You've been busy," Elise said instead, her tone neutral, the accusation carefully buried beneath the surface.
"I have," Carter admitted, looking down. "But I.. I couldn't not come."
Elise leaned back, crossing her arms. "And yet you could not show up all the other times."
Carter winced, his lips pressing into a thin line. He looked out of the window, the rain reflecting in his eyes. "It's not that simple."
"Isn't it?" Elise's voice softened, and she hated herself for it. "You either show up, or you don't. You either choose me, or you don't."
Carters' shoulders drooped, and he looked vulnerable for the first time, stripped bare of that careworn confidence he had always carried on him. "I choose you," he whispered low. "I'm not ready to be what you want."
Elise let the words sink in, their weight settling over her chest. "Maybe I shouldn't have let you let me go," she said quietly, the pain raw in her voice.
Carter's head snapped up, his eyes searching Elise’s face. For a moment, it seemed as though he might say something, but then the waitress came with a fresh pot of coffee, and that moment was gone.
Elise shook her head. She pushed her chair back and stood, grabbing her coat. "I can't keep doing this, Carter. You don't have to be ready for me. But I have to be ready to live without you."
She walked out into the rain, and didn't look back.
Her friends nicknamed her, 'The Bolter'.
Started with a kiss, "Oh, we must stop meeting like this",
But it always ends up with a Town Car speeding out the drive one evening
Ended with the slam of a door but she's got the best stories you can be sure
That as she was leaving, it felt like freedom
All her fuckin' lives, flashed before her eyes (And she realized)
It feels like the time, she fell through the ice
Then came out alive.